i can’t change it, i wouldn’t change it. we’re better for it, but you’d be a fool not to wish for that ignorance again. every relationship has that undefined corner, it has to be analyzed. it has to be understood and lit up. the result will be the same, but the tour could have been longer. we should have come through the side door. we would have found so much more to share, and still ended up stronger people in the end. that epiphany that still stands today. it eliminated all other options. a cut and dry decision with no emotion. incredible that it can exist admist all the love in the world. so simple. so right. it makes perfect sense and no sense. the only question now is what role were soulmates meant to play away from one another. you are still searching for the one love, while i try to make sense of all its potential definitions. we’ll continue to share notes, compare stories, and try to make that next embrace last one more second.
this is the moment until the next one. it has to start somewhere. a false start attempts action. physically you are where you were, but you know more than a second before.
i was obsessed with figuring life out as soon as possible. then, all i would have to do is play the game, go through the motions, conquer it, and have plenty of time to explore. no stress. complete freedom. instead i’m trapped in a room without power. no conduction, no spark, no outlet, no power.
where does the journey end? does it matter. the journey is the story. the back cover is a filter for the ignorant.
say what you will. it was peaceful. it was alive. split seconds of perfection that added up to more pure happiness than i knew what to do with.
outlets are hard to find, but necessary. i feel out of balance. i’m falling into easy habits too often. find myself waiting for inspiration. always assuming it will find me. No effort required. it’s always worked that way. why would it stop? if it doesn’t work that way, then it wasn’t meant to happen.
wake up. set myself on fire. turn it upside down. again? again.